Skinny and happy?

If I lose weight, will I automatically be happy? Will I automatically be more attractive to my husband. Will I be a better mother, friend, employee? Will I really be more healthy? I don't really get sick now, I don't have high cholesterol. I smoke, I drink, I don't eat right, I don't really exercise.
If I can't eat the crap that I love to eat, but my BMI is where "people" tell me it needs to be, how is that happy?

Everyone will die someday. The day you are born is the day you start to die. There's no way around it. I don't want to live forever. I want to die before I get old. I can't conform to "societies" expectation of beauty, and I never will. I can't weigh 100 lbs. I can't even weigh 125, or 135. I'd be pushing the envelope at 165. I've seen pictures of myself when I was at my thinnest, before I had Connor. I weighed 173 lbs. I looked like a freaking' supermodel. (Well, as much as someone who's only 5'4" CAN look like a supermodel.) I have put on weight since then, but I don't think I look like a beached whale.

I was at work the other night, smoking outside with one of the guys from the meat department. Two "girls" that he knew walked up and sat down. We all exchanged pleasantries, and started chatting. They were gonna "go to the club" that night, and I said, "wow, I'm so glad I'm married! If I had to date now a days, I'd go crazy!" We then got to talking about how long I'd been married, and how many kids I had. Then, after I informed them that I'd had 2 kids. The one girl, the blond of course, says, "I'm never going to have kids! I don't want to get FAT! I love my body the way it is, and I'm never going to change that! Stretch marks, and sagging, no way!" Laughing the whole time.
I was rendered speechless. The guy I was outside with, immediately saw the look on my face, and changed the subject. I couldn't believe that the girl had actually said that out loud. We went back into the store, got back to work. The whole time, I was thinking to myself, "I may be fat, but I'm married, and you're not!" Stupid skinny, pretty, tramps are not what men want to marry. They are the girls that will always be on the outside looking in, wishing that their "boyfriend" will leave his wife for her. (By the way, even if he did ever leave his wife for you, he'd do the SAME thing to you. You're really not that special. You're just a piece of ass. Get used to it.)

All I know is, I am proud to be a wife and mother, and anyone who thinks that their body is more important than a child, doesn't deserve to have a child. Get over yourself, and please don't procreate!