There are so many things that I want to change about myself, but I don't really know how. I am tired of hiding in my house all the time. I want to go out and do things, but am still finding it really hard. It seems that I am on the verge of going somwhere other than work, or grocery shopping, and then I chicken out. I am by no means agoraphobic, but would still rather stay home than go out. I feel bad for my son, who hardly ever asks to go anywhere anymore. I've turned him into a miniature version of myself, and should be ashamed.
I have decided that I need to get to the doctor, and maybe go back on the meds I was on for a such a long time. It's been almost a year that I've been off of them, and I didn't really want to go back on. My husband seems to think that it's not necessary for me to go back on. He thinks that meds are a waste of money. I totally do not agree with him at all. Even if they are just placebo, they work for me. I am a little easier to deal with when I'm medicated. (not high, but had my brain chemistry altered by an approved prescription medication specifically for depression). I hate going to work, I don't want to clean my house, I don't want to shop even. I'm making the appointment....